Heavay Heavaaaaaaay (in my best Effie White voice)
Let’s talk about weight. So, I am a solid size 16 on most days. I have vacillated between a size 14-18 since I was in the 8th grade. Needless to say, I’m a big girl – thick girl –plus size - full figured – queen sized - thickums. Since I was almost 10 pounds when I was born, let’s just say I have a lot of experience in this area. Basically, I ain’t new to this, I’m true to this. However, most of my life I have been told I am overweight. And let’s face it… facts! Buuuutttttt for the most part – at least on paper – I am a mostly healthy – mostly fit person. I mean, I can do like 8 pushups in one pop and like 5 burpees at a time. So basically, I could be a Zumba instructor.
Although, I have long desired to lose weight, it has been a lifelong struggle – though struggle might be too strong of a word. Cuz let’s face it, food. (do I need to say more?) But, this post is not going to be about my weight loss struggle or even reasons to lose weight. On the contrary, I want to tell you why I actually enjoy being a Big Girl.
Number 5: I’m soft. When I rub on myself I hear Martin’s character in House Party whispering in my ear, “you so soft and cuddly – like my hush puppies.” On the off chance I am willing to hold a baby, I am able to quickly put them to sleep – cuz I’m soft like a pillow. And, when people need comforting and I embrace them with a hug – I have been told I feel “comfortable.” And yes, I take that as a compliment.
Number 4: My belly is amazing. So clearly I don’t have a six-pack, it’s more like a two-pack. A top belly and a bottom belly aka a foopa. When I am sick. I lay in bed and hold my belly, and she comforts me. When I am full, I rub my belly as if to say, “you good now girl?” And she responds with a soft low purr (more like a growl) to let me know she is- she’s real good.
Number 3: Built-in heating system. Growing up in New Jersey it is a given that winters get cold. Also, attending Michigan State University for undergrad, I quickly learned that a season could be down-right disrespectful. Because winter in East Lansing, needed to be punched in the face. However, for the most part, whether in New Jersey or Michigan, I was good. I could simply place my hands between my thick thighs, under my full belly, or under my bountiful breasts and instantly warm up. This thickness clearly has its benefits.
Number 2: The Element of Surprise. I found that I was often underestimated due to my size. I was a cheerleader for my entire adolescence. And not just any cheerleader. I was captain of the Varsity cheerleading team in middle school and high school. And I was definitely shaking this tail feather on the dance team in college. Also, in case you were unaware, big girls are like everyone else. We can run, jump, dance, and have flexibility too. I know, I know… mind blowing.
Number 1: My absolute favorite thing about being a big girl – thick girl –plus size - full figured – queen sized – thickums, is that whenever I am out, whether at the club or a cookout, and the song Watch out for the Big Girl starts playing, I recognize that as my cue to SLAY! And slay, I do. I mean I act all the way up on this ode to girls like me – and always always end in a split. Don’t believe me…? #askaboutme!
I hope you enjoyed this post. Come on over to my Youtube and EbTheCeleb Podcast to hear more!